Nonny, that sure is a good question, so let me do my best to explain. Since you are asking me this question, I doubt you will even understand or agree with my way of thinking, but here goes.
Sansa is my favorite character. She has been my favorite character since Season 2, before Ramsay even entered the picture. Nothing will change that. Then, Ramsay came along, and although I hated his guts at first, I quickly developed feelings of attraction towards him. And, although I was forewarned in advance of how awfully he would end up treating the Starks, I knew that nothing he did would change my feelings for him, either. So, that’s the start of it. I love both characters for entirely different reasons.
I will start by saying I knew about the rape scene in advance. I spoiled myself because I had to know when Ramsay died, and well, oops, I accidentally found out that detail in the process. Approaching that particular episode, I expected the rape scene to be much, much worse than what was actually shown. I imagined him physically restraining and beating her as she cried and he ripped her to pieces. Instead, I got…him ripping her dress open, pushing her gently down on the bed, and Reek’s face. I sighed in relief.
BUT OMGZZ WHY AREN’T I ANGRY AND CURSING RAMSAY AND THROWING THINGS AT THE TV?!?!?!?!
First of all, I don’t ENJOY seeing her hurt. What I ENJOY, is seeing Ramsay in a position of dominance and power. I get off on that, sexually. Even if it means doing some not-so-nice things to my girl.
But, it gets even better.
I SHIP Ramsay and Sansa *GASPPPPP*
But…how could I do such a horrible thing?!?!?!
Because his dominance, and her innocence, makes for an interesting dynamic that lends itself to yummy fantasies and fanfiction. Plus, it’s my two favorite characters. Why not ship them? Who cares how much sense it DOESN’T make, it’s just a fictional ship, right?
But…this has to mean that rape and sexual assault don’t bother you!!
Actually…it’s kind of the opposite. As it should be. I despise it. It is one of the lowest, most disgusting acts a human being can perform. It violates not only someone’s personal space, but their body, their boundaries, their emotions, their psyche, their peace of mind.
How the fuck do I know that? Cause I’ve been there. Multiple times.
But guess what? It’s fiction. It ain’t real. It’s still a little difficult for me to swallow, and I KNOW that it is inherently wrong, cause, you know, I have a soul as a matter of fact. If I saw a guy I loved raping my best friend in real life, I would beat the living shit out of him and have his ass thrown in jail, no matter hot he was or what my feelings were for him.
But hey, luckily I’m not in that situation. Cause it’s just a show, y’know?
You want to know something even MORE insane?
Rickon is my favorite Stark brother.
That’s right, Rams kills my baby Rickon in a brutal, heartless way and you know what? I still love him.
But see, humans are complex beings. I’m able to separate my feelings of sadness at seeing Rickon die, and my love for an evil, hot psycho.
I’m able to separate my anger at seeing Sansa hurt, and my adoration of a sausage-eating bastard.
I LOVE the Starks, and I hate seeing their home taken from them. But, I LOVE the Boltons, and I love seeing them fuck shit up.
I wanted Jon and Sansa to win Battle of the Bastards and get Winterfell back, but GUESS WHAT?
I didn’t want to see Ramsay lose, either. Or die. And that episode is my absolute favorite in the entire show. It is a fucking wet dream. Seeing Ramsay in command, being the sexy shit that he is, and completely stringing Jon along, makes my heart flutter. But, seeing Jon and Sansa KICK ASS and take back Winterfell, gives me warm, tingly feelings inside.
Watching Ramsay’s last moments makes my heart sink into my stomach. But, watching Sansa getting the last word and her BADASS SMIRK as she walks away, is one of the most beautiful, empowering things I have ever seen.
I could go on, nonny, but, I think you get the point by now. Hopefully. If not, then there really isn’t more I can do to beat it into your skull.
tl;dr: I am a human being with complex thoughts and feelings. I hate seeing Sansa hurt, but I love seeing Ramsay be an evil asshole. Simple as that.